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Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Fuck Google!

Sorry just annoyed at the extra effort I had to make to login to a website that hasn’t even made any improvements for the extra money! CORPORATE WHORES!!!!!!


So recently we’ve been letting the side down a little when it comes to the blogging community, the old gang has split and fractured a bit since the good old days or yor when our unique and dynamic comedy styling changed the way people think about the internet. The rot set in when blog founder Jamal left the department to work for the over paid, over funded, over there, SAP whores that dominate the corporate landscape at ‘The Company’. Who could blame our intrepid leader for losing his sense of humor after being surrounded by the living dead for 8 hours a day?

Then the true killing blow came, yours truly decided he had had enough and told ‘The Company’ exactly what it could do with its grossly underpaid job. Despite almost going crazy watching reruns of ‘Open All Hours’ and ‘Porridge’ and wearing my penis down to a nub as I pummeled myself raw to internet pron, I managed to keep my dignity and I’ve never looked back. Needles to say, without their inspirational leader to keep their brain monkeys swinging things started to decline rapidly on the Jammyblog.

Shortly thereafter the third pillar of strength tumbled to the ground as our very own ‘Mr Reliable’ left for sunnier climes. If you’re reading this Kimbo I wish the all the best down there in sunny Oz! If you’re not reading this, then I hate your fucking guts for living in a better county than me, which is (at least according to UK telly) packed with fit birds just like the ones off Home and Away. Bastard!

Then just like a rat leaving a sinking ship, the Grimster decided that he better get out of there before ‘ze Germans’ arrived and made everyone wear lederhosen, one swift exit left later and our patented random word generator (without a firewall) was gone, reducing the overall profanity levels in the department by an impressive 4000%!!

And this Dear Reader, is how the seed of doom were sewn for the Jammyblog, the inspiration was gone, the posts began to dwindle, crowds of former-readers wandered aimlessly through the streets of the worlds major cities, desperately looking for a Word of the Day or something to make them go ‘Hmmmm’.

Life became dull.


….all in not lost Dear Reader, yours truly has sent out the call! Across the land they hear it, echoing across the mountains and the plains into the ears of our former contributors. Like some kind of League of Extraordinary Gentlemen they come, drawn by a primeval need to post random acts of intellectual self harm anonymously on the internet.

The people wait, they can feel the change in the air. Soon THEY will come, soon the battle will be joined and soon they will be free!!




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