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Tuesday, February 20, 2007

I'm a lumberjack?

So recently at our place of gainful employment we've been going through a sudden glut of "eco-friendly mega global conglomarate sure we can be nice to the planet but on our terms" otherwise known as ISO14001, which on the surface appears to be a way to pay your way to an eco-friendly rubber stamp, but that said, it got me thinking about stuff.

Maybe I should turn off the Microwave, I don't really use the clock on it - I never read the frackin' manual to set it and it's always 17 hours out anyway.

Mirth and merriment was to be had by us IT dudes with all the switching off stuff idea, things only ever break when you turn them ON - Dell's gotta be loving it (wonder if they sponsor the ISO14001 standard? Now there's a conspiracy theory for yah).

Anyhoo it appears that a mature tree gobbles up a bazillion kilos of Co2 in it's lifetime - what if I bought a whole woods?

Now don't get me wrong, I don't want to trade my Co2 emissions and be able to sleep at night knowing that future generations will be just dandy because I bought a patch of woodland in some unknown area of North Wales (prolly get it burned down by those nationalist Welshies anyway) but the kiddy in me immediately came out.

Oh wow - imagine - you could get your mates down there and run about with sticks for tommy guns.. pew pew - you're toast Fritz!

Kipping out under a bivvy and making "creature of the forest" flavour coffee over a campfire made from your own trees.

Rope swings? Tree houses? fuck me the possibilities are almost endless, best of all, you can't get done for it - it's your woods!

So I thought I'd mention it to the wife, kinda casually as you do, convo went something like...

"Hey love - can I have a woods"?
"It'd be great we can sleep at night knowing we've done something to offset the wasteful Western lifestyle we lead, the hours of TV and computer usage, the evil emissions our vehicles make whilst sat queueing on the A628 every morning, I'm not going all eco-hippy but I think we'd be doing ourselves and future generations a great service by ensuring at least one part of this small island we live on remains green".

"Are you taking the piss"?

"Um - yeah - of course I am"



  • Didn't you do enough camping in the woods between the ages of 18-28??

    By Blogger puggsley1980, at Wednesday, February 21, 2007  

  • It may sound stupid, but I actually picked up a guide from the internet. Maybe if you give it a little more thought the Mrs might change her mind. Try getting more information from Here

    By Blogger Jamal, at Wednesday, February 21, 2007  

  • Now you see, I think the missus is just being a plain old spoilsport.. You can't have it all your own way. Like living near grass and trees (hence slowband internet access) and not want to have a little bit of nature yourself. That's just selfish... I agree with Jammo fella, get yourself a forrest, or at least a wood (ooohhh eerr)

    By Blogger pugmiester, at Thursday, February 22, 2007  

  • It's not my fault I have a smaller "pipe" than most of the other boys.
    I like it and it works all the time....

    By Blogger Grimster, at Friday, February 23, 2007  

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