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Monday, February 09, 2009

Second Life

In a flash of inspiration it's come to me, you should be able to exchange your life for another. Now I'm not talking about whacking some pubbie amd stealing his identity, more being able to transfer your life to another area.

OK, not very clear, I play an MMPORG called Eve Online, and have done for the last 5 years or more. Wouldn't it be cooler if you could transfer your existence into that game environment? Sure, downtimes sould be a PITA as you'd suddenly lost all knowledge, or you could always work your schedules around 23 hours per day, but how cool would it be to be sipping mohitas on the bridge of your spacecraft, or banging that bit of tail in second life - whatever floats your boat really, but, instead of having to switch off and go back to the drudge of work, stay there with your countless billions with hot and cold running exotic dancers.

Yeah OK, it's kind of childish escapism - here's one that isn't.

Employers should allow all long-term workers to have a 6-month break. I was thinking about it this morning. I've been in gainful employment since the age of 16, and have another 25 useful years to an employer. Truth is I'm fucking knackered and could really do with a break. Sure, it's a bit whiney and shit, but, think about it. Half way through your productive working life, you should get a nice holiday, I mean fuck me, students get to do it in Uni and they're only there a few years, I've been doing this shit for nearly 25.

Then you can happily come back to work for the next couple of decades knowing you've had a riot for 6 months, nah, fuck it, make it a year. I'll happily piss away a year of retirement for a year off now. Seriously. It's not like I'm planning on doing anything when I retire except maybe smelling slightly of piss and getting drunk lots.

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

Quote of the day..

Jammy: Some of these users need a good shake.

Grimster: Yeah - like Baby P

Tuesday, February 03, 2009


I'm growing fur on my head.

It's true and something I've not done for 20 odd-years but does have the advantage of indicating what an old fart I'm becoming with lots of grey coming out - gawd - anyone would think I was properly old.

So - I was thinking of going MANGA! I've sworn not to cut it for a year - mainly because I can and have limited options for new years resolutions not being a smoker anymore (just over 4 years tab-free) so was thinking along the lines of "Super Saiyan" manga-head peroxide blonde.
How compatible this will be with the office working environment I'm not sure as the only person in the history of the company to be so radical with hair-colouring was Kimbo, and that was a reddish-brown on black and not that noticeable, in fact he was the one in the office with any fashion sense at all outside the "creative" advertising department.... Until he pissed his rep away when he traded down from a Lexus to a Subaru of course.

My only worry is once I do it I'll need to either keep doing it - or cut it all off again...

Mid-life crisis? You bet!

Monday, February 02, 2009


So while shamelessly wasting company time and chatting up my workmates, we stumbled across a nice collection of rude-emoticons. You're all familiar with the internet standard :) :( :P >:( type things. But we took it to another level. While some have been done before, we we're very proud of ourselves non the less.

( . )( . ) = boobs

( o )( o ) = boobs that are happy to see you

(_|_) = bottom

(_o_) = experienced bottom

(_0_) = FinFL bottom (private joke)

(_*_) = morning after bottom

(|) = Front bum

( Y ) = Front bum MrkII

<======3 = wang

~~~~~<======3 = very happy wang

And as if this debauchery wasn't bad enough, we then started on the rude maths. Oh yes, but I’ll leave that to your imagination!

Post your own, via comments!

Holy back from the dead Batman!!

Jesus Christ riding a unicycle, its been bloody ages since we posted anything on here. Today i get a google spam mail telling me some fucknut (*looks at grim) has resent me my password. Hint-iddy-hint-hint!

So here i am, once again polluting your minds with my disgraceful spelling, substandard grammar foul mouthed, twisted humour posting!! Fucking A!

You'll all be glad to know that during my sabbatical i have become even more of a interwebs meme machine, so expect me to be posting lolcats, mudkips and generally being in your base killing your dudes.

It'll take a while for me to warm up. In the meantime, have some Foamy to remind you all of my awesome rants!


Yeah - Cheesy but WTF is wrong with this shitty country - a little bit of frozen precipitation and the whole world goes to shit.
This is where I should be whining on about "when I was a lad it was proper snowy" - which it was etc. but it seems we've forgotten totally how to travel in cold conditions.

I was in Iceland just over a year ago, proper ice storms 'n everything and there was dudes going around eating ice-cream from a shop there called snaeland! Now that's hardcore! In Finland you can't pass your driving test unless you've done proper skid-pan training.

We suck hard.